Why I’ll Never Skateboard to School Again

So, this lovely little story starts in the bathroom (Well, that sounds wrong). I was tying up my hair, decided to look at my phone for the time and… oh crap. I was late for my exam. When I say late, I don’t mean actually late. For some reason, I always go into panic mode even if I’m late by a few seconds. And I always add an extra ten minutes for anything that could go wrong (Yes, to my friends, this is why I’m always unnecessarily early for everything).

My brain when I’m “late”: PANIC. THIS IS NOT A DRILL. I REPEAT THIS IS NOT A DRILL.

I sprint the full five meters to my bedroom and swing my bag onto my back. I take a faithful glance at my hardly used skateboard, and stupidly think “Why not, skateboarding will make me go faster.”

I’m about 20 meters from my house when I realize that it’s actually very hard to skateboard with a skirt that is two sizes too big, heels and a bag that probably weighs more than your couch. Ah ha, another bright idea to save the day: I’ll take my shoes off. Splendid. Nothing better than a teenage girl in her school uniform looking like she’s just got out of bed.

It’s all fun and games until I see a very unfortunate girl from my netball team walking to school for the same exam. Yay, the more the merrier! I’m fairly positive she thought I was a complete and utter crackpot before this even happened, but the fact that she saw me in the state that I was in must have been the icing on the cake for her.

So I did the polite thing, waved, said hello and then proceeded on my very fascinating journey for a further few meters. I tried, believe me, to keep on going. A set of issues were in my way, including a patch of particularly problematic seeds on the footpath. I fumbled, stumbled and mumbled. Like a true legend.

I gave up. Yes, I gave up.

Let’s just say I had a lovely conversation with the girl from my netball team on the way to school that ended with me stopping to put my shoes back on and her walking away a little too fast to be normal.

A word of warning to you all: Wheels DO NOT equal faster.